I consider our dog, Malakhai, to be our first-born child. He acts more “human” than dog most times! So, naturally, I was worried about introducing our new little one to Malakhai. When I first found out I was pregnant I was over-joyed but I also had a knot in my stomach because I knew Malakhai’s life would be altered forever. He would no longer be the center of our world; we would have to share our attention with the little one.
I think Malakhai knew I was pregnant from the beginning. Shortly after finding out I was pregnant we were laying on the couch watching a movie. Malakhai was lying down by my legs. Later he jumped over my legs and smelled my belly and curled up with me laying his head on my belly. Of course, being in the first trimester I was a basket case anyhow, but this set me over the edge I could hardly stop crying! I thought that meant Malakhai was accepting that I was having a baby.
Throughout my pregnancy I would research ways to prepare dogs for babies, I was ask friends and family who had babies and dogs what they did and how their dogs reacted. For the most part I got the same answer: the dog will accept the new little one into their life, but it will take time. But knowing Malakhai, I felt like he might not accept the little one so easily.
After giving birth to Noah, we were so excited to get home and start our lives as a family. But at the same time I dreaded coming home because I felt guilty that Malakhai’s life would never be the same. I had read that you should get a piece of clothing or blanket that the baby slept in and give it to the dog before you head home. That way they are at least familiar with their smell. So I had my mom take a hat Noah had worn with her to give to Malakhai. When given the hat, he curled up with it and slept! Finally, we drove home. When we came in Malakhai was ecstatic to see us! He kind of sniffed Noah but didn’t seem to interested in him. I breathed a sigh of relief thinking the worst was over. But I was wrong.
In the coming days Malakhai would not come near me or Noah. He wanted nothing to do with me. He would sit in his bed with his back towards me. When I’d call him, he moved his ear back but wouldn’t turn around. As if saying, “I hear you mom, but I’m mad.”
I cried a couple times because he wouldn’t come near me for at least two weeks. Then finally one day I was feeding Noah on the couch and Malakhai jumped up on the couch and lay down on the opposite side of Noah and I. I was really happy because I felt like this was progress; even if it were baby steps, it was progress! Little by little, Malakhai inched closer and closer to us as Noah fed. All in all, it took about six weeks for Malakhai to lay next to me.
Now, Noah is four months old and Malakhai still isn’t crazy about Noah. But he has accepted him. I think there will always be a part of him that is still mad at me about bringing home another baby. But I’m so relieved that he has at least come around and isn’t as unhappy as those first few days and weeks.
Discovering Natural Motherhood 